Eating, Drinking and Being Merry -- States of Being

So I've been away... for nearly two weeks now. It was uni holidays. Yes I had more time to think but well nothing really worth telling you about. I did however go to Melbourne. That may also have contributed to problems.

I loved Melbourne. It had so much food and drink, they were all over the shop. I went down there for the purpose of seeing a concert with my father. It was a band called, 'Yes', they were excellant and I saw them at a place called 'the Palazio'. It was a truely wonderful venue. IT was a converted old cinema or theatre. Big commpfy leather seats two teir and just a lovely venue. The band was amazing, I hear with a change, maybe two to the line up they would be even better but I tell you what I was stoked to see them and very impressed.

I tried swordfish and drank a variety of beers and cocktails. If I could afford to I'd love to do that all the time. Out with friends, eating and drinking and being merry.

It struck me how much I value and want to do that and want to have people around me to do that too. I also want to be able to afford to do this. What I'll sacrifice to do that I'm not sure yet.

All the things we want to do everywhere you want to be, see and do they cost. Whether it is in money or time, energy, sleep or doing something else. I don't know how you give these things worth but in the end I think I do what will make me happiest. Even if its painful now it may give the oppotunity to be happy in the future. Happy is where I want to be. Its not a goal for me just a state of being sometimes its easier sometimes harder but it is just a state.

So come with me lets eat, drink and be merry.

How things might be -- Stories

This university path that I'm taking is an interesting. New friends and the like but the other day I had an oppotunity to share the last couple years of my story with some guys. They were shocked. They thought it was pretty full on some of the stuff that happened. Despite this, (and it's probably true) I don't think on it as incredibly full on, not now. In reflection some of it wasn't much fun but damn there was a lot of learning to be done. Lots of lessons, lots of growing. Above all, things just keep going. It's one of the reasons I'm always reminded that these things to will pass.

Having said that I don't revel in the oppotunity to share my story as I once did. Not much I can learn from the recount I give. I like to hear theirs, other stories. I like hearing that someone else may have seen what I have that I am connected to them in some distance and convoluted way. I've always been very open about my story though. If someone will ask then I will tell. The story I tell though is just my veiw of it. I will admit it is probably inaccurate, there are many flaws in human memory documented and I am after all just another man.

It has been really interesting going back to uni. There are people all around me younger and older; some even my age. For some of the first years I was working five days a week when they started year eight in high school. Yet others who were working when I was in year eight! I'm really enjoying all the interaction with people. I love being social and it gives me energy. It wont last, there are only so many shallow relationships one can deal with I think but we shall see. There so many ideas, good and bad, opinions right and wrong, and so much pool and beer. Things I like very much.

I'm travelling to Melbourne next week for a concert I'll let you all know about it. Should be a good bit of fun. Going with Dad for music but I can't wait to eat and drink and with those two things going down well I'll be bloody merry!

Talk to you soon.

Smash, Crash, Whoops -- Mistakes

The problem with mistakes is that you can never fix them. Not really. You can do things properly but once you have made the mistake; it's made. I'm always amused at people who say they live with no regrets and for a number of reasons. Particularly people who say they dont regret anything. I tell you what there are things I wish I hadn't done. I regret things but do my best to move on, accept, learn and continue onwards. The whole idea to me that someone has nothing where they say, 'well kinda wish I hadn't done that', is laughable. There has got to be someone who you've hurt, something that you've said, something you've done. There is nothing wrong with regret.

The point is I feel like I should be someplace else. I've lost three years wasting time. This is a silly thought and a totally rediculous dellusional illusion. Just can't shake that feeling that I should just be somewhere not, where I am. Don't get me wrong, I think I'm on the right path, just lagging behind.

Most of this is probably in reference to others, (always a bad place to begin). There is nothing I can do about it, so accept I will and move on. The world after all keeps spinning. Just if you could all stop getting good jobs and careers, getting girlfriends, boyfriends, fiances and spouses. You know just till I've caught up.

Mistakes can be fixed though, just gotta make sure it didn't do too much damage first. I hear time heals all wounds, even if that's not true it must heal a great deal of them.