Writers block and Wrecking Balls -- Not advice, or quote, or wise.

I think this is about the third time I've opened this up now and still don't really have anything new. They say there is nothing new under the sun but after a massive six months of this I'd be concerned if I was repeating myself without any changes, without any growth.

The thing is people still come and go from lives drifting in and out. People still disappoint and let you down, surprise you and if they're good build you up. Uni is a challenge which one should work harder at and I'm not as fit as I could be. Want to practice more of those instruments and continue to try new things and get back into those things I no longer have been able to make time for.

I have over the last six months always wanted to write about all those quotes and wisdom statements you see on the internet and Facebook. So many people comment on them and like them. Yet I've found often if I spend 30 seconds looking at it, the quote is a poor one. In fact it will generally be a hopelessly romanticized way to see the world. It does not work and can not work. We all subscribe to this wonderfulness and really its not wonderful, its despairing. That is not to say there are no good quotes, no good wisdom statements, no good observations on the human reality. On contra ire they're just not popular (on the whole).

I think one of the most touted pieces of advice is, 'be yourself'. I honestly have no idea what that means. Does it mean I should do what I think I should do, because that is what I'm already doing. Or does it mean I should do what I feel is right regardless of the rules and standards around me, but that is really dangerous. What if I believe in culling the stupid?! Now I'm not suggesting all advice and wisdom has to be universal. Just well thought out. Just because someone likes a sentiment doesn't mean it is a useful or helpful sentiment. Often it is just a reflection of a place we used to be in. An example of a connection to a past which no longer exists.

So next time you see a 30 great quotes web page or someone posts something on Facebook, look at them and wonder to yourself does it mean anything? does it help me now? In the end that's what you need it for and maybe it would be nice to reflect on how nice it would be if things could be that simple.

I think I saw a 2 -- Dreams

So I had a crazy and incredibly vivid dream this morning.... hmmm, on second thought this needs some reference point for you guys.

I used to not dream. I know they say you always dream but if you can't ever recall your dreams it makes no difference whether it happened or not, trees falling in forests and all that. Once I did start dreaming (or remembering) I became a bit of a lucid dreamer. Basically a a lucid dreamer is someone who has awareness and control of their dreams. I remember this one and I was not in control and I was not aware.

Honestly it scared me some.

I dreamt of a uni assignment. My group (which has truly been a nightmare for me (not the group but one person in it)), my tutor and my presentation. Now I became aware that it was a dream about 20 minutes after I woke myself up. Basically I failed and it wasn't my fault. I failed and I was pissed about it. There was yelling, a compelling argument, good reasoning and my tutor ran off being a douche.

This was all really vivid even now about 7 hours ago. I can recall clothing I was wearing, responses and all sorts.  I mean the only things I have ever dreamt about this vividly I'm not going to share with you.

Now, I'm not one to see meaning where there is none. I trust my dreams are as far as I can control them. However maybe for once I care about something that isn't just a person. If I care as much as this suggests perhaps I should really try do it well. Still I'd rather not care too much, I don't like these dreams, hows any ones dream interpretation skills? Want to tell me its all meaningless drivel of an over active subconscious, that would make life easier.

Talk to you all soon.
I've been more active on my twitter recently. I either post funny things or stuff I found interesting. Gonna try keep it going though so if you're interested keep watch.
https://twitter.com/#!/Aejms